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In my first 23 years of existence in this world, I haven’t attended a single wedding. I turned 24 last December and I have already attended two, and I don’t want to attend anymore.

I’m done.

With my cousins getting married one after the other, although the grand event of a wedding is all about happiness and fun, attending one is quite taxing.

Punctuality

Well, first of all, Indian weddings are a lengthy affair.

An organized affair like a wedding requires punctuality, and Indians are anything but punctual. Now that a wedding involves a lot of people, expect things to run off schedule and get chaotic.

Given that I am someone who prefers being punctual and organized, I am yet to learn how to live life the Indian way.

Last week, it was my cousin’s wedding. He arrived 5 hours late to his own wedding.

Photoshoot

It’s understandable if the bride and groom want to capture those incredible priceless moments of their lives in a picture.

But, an extensive photoshoot for every single ritual? Well, am using the word ‘photoshoot’ because they pause and pose for every single click. They even redo the ritual if the pictures don’t come out nice.

Well, is the marriage for the rituals or for an insta-worthy picture?


ALSO READ: Bhopal’s Jains & Gujataris Ban Pre-Wedding Photoshoots; But How About Banning Creepy Uncles Instead?


You’re next

In every wedding, you meet relatives. They come in different varieties but each with default questions like, “What do you study?”, “What job do you do?”, or “What are you planning on doing with your life?”

Some modern varieties come with customized questions like “Are you dating someone?” and “What’s your Facebook ID?” Then it becomes an awkward moment for me since their Facebook profiles are already on my block list.

Nevertheless, every relative tends to end the conversation with a creepy smile and a standardised dialogue “You are next”.

A bit too much

I am not an introvert. But, a wedding is gathering of a lot of people- too many for me to process.

Too many people, too much loud noise, too much gossip and too much perfume.

Did I mention too much drama? Indian weddings are incomplete without gossip and drama, with one leading to another.

In my first 23 years of existence in this world, I haven’t attended a single wedding. I turned 24 last December and I have already attended two. I will have to attend another next week.

Help!


Image Credits: Google Images

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